Resources: How to Talk So Kids Will Listen

Confession time: I (Daye) have not one but SIX copies of this book (and its sister books, How to Talk So Teens Will Listen & Listen So Teens Will Talk, and How to Talk So Kids Can Learn) on my bookshelf.  As I say in class: whenever I find a copy at a thrift store, I buy it, because I love to give them away.  

How to Talk was originally published in 1980, by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish.  It's been revised and sold millions of copies since.  I remember seeing it on my Mom's nightstand when I was a kid.  "That's dumb," I thought at the time; "she'll never get that to work on me."  (In retrospect, seven-year-old-me was wrong; it wasn't, and she did).  

Decades later, as an adult, I rediscovered the book when working as an outdoor educator at Strathcona Park Lodge.  It opens with one of my favourite lines: "I was a great parent before I had kids." (Now Mom to a 4-month-old; can confirm).  Filled with cartoons, anecdotes, and humour, How to Talk is an effective and empathetic primer on communicating with humans of any age.  

At Strathcona, I realized it was changing the way I talked to the schoolkids I worked with, but also how I was talking to my co-workers and friends.  I eventually started running workshops based on How To Talk for other outdoor educators there.  I can confidently say this book was the beginning of a path that saw me going back to school to become a counsellor. 

In honour of Mother's Day, I'm highlighting How to Talk as our resource of the month.  Look for it at a thrift store near you -- or try here.